How It Works
"Well, Governor Palin's back in the news today. She spoke at a benefit for Shoot The Doves, which surprised no one, given that the group's initials are S-T-D."
"Pretty pathetic, good old Dennis Perrin, what a commentary there. Very sad to not recognize what shooting doves is all about. But it reminds us that some joke writers have a long way to go in understanding what the rest of America understands -- bird hunting has nothing to do with sexually transmitted diseases, nor do most American governors."
"Recently, I posted a cheap shot at Gov. Palin's sexuality. Am I guilty of poor taste? Maybe. Did I suggest that the governor actually has STDs? Fuck no. Would I make the same joke were Gov. Palin a man? Sure. Male politicians are usually far worse than their female counterparts. But since I believe in gender equality, I let Gov. Palin have it as well. And she can have it any time."
THE FOLLOW UP RESPONSE:
"Mr. Perrin's so-called 'apology' was typically insincere and quite vulgar, suggesting I might want to 'have' him. Middle-aged comedy writers may think it's okay to proposition happily married women who use their sexuality for political effect, but the rest of America doesn't. And again, this diverts attention from shooting doves, which is the important issue I was originally endorsing. What a sick, sad fool he is."
THE SECOND APOLOGY:
"The STD joke, really, in and of itself, can be defended, but I simply lack the interest and the energy. So, if it helps Gov. Palin for me to apologize, and will keep her from using Alaskan state resources to pry into my personal life, then I apologize for having posted that joke. It's not your fault that it was misunderstood. It's my fault for not writing something sharper. I'll try to do better in the future."
THE FINAL ACCEPTANCE:
"Of course Mr. Perrin's apology is accepted, especially on behalf of young women who are accused of having STDs while promoting dove hunting. Mr. Perrin certainly has the right to 'joke' about whatever he wants to, and thankfully we have the right to express our reaction. And this is all thanks to our U.S. military women and men killing and interrogating Muslims in order to secure America's right to free speech -- in this case, may that right be used to promote creative timidity and self-censorship."