The Story So Far

Whenever Republicans gather en masse, you get to see the worst in white people. Not that white lefties are much better -- in some ways, they're worse -- but at least with them one can be a little looser, a touch crazier, depending on the room. (A few years ago, right before I did stand up for a local peacenik fundraiser, the woman in charge, who was also the emcee, nixed a masturbation joke I'd just written, fearing that it might seem "sexist"and "pornographic." So there's that.) White reactionaries, in my experience, live in another world altogether; a dismal, narrow place that feeds their resentment, fear, and hatred.

The professional rightists I've hung out with seemed full of ideological gusto when talking about communism, guns, the flag. But get a few drinks into them, and they'd become nerdy, insecure, anxious to seem "on." They were also open to sexual humor, but only the crudest, dumbest lines. One guy I knew for a time admitted to me that he fantasized about fucking liberal women. They seemed exotic to him. I said that liberal women were overrated, that you had to go for the more radical, crazy types to have any serious fun. I also mentioned my fling with an Objectivist, the only time I slept with someone to my right. "Naw," he countered, waving his hand. "Those Randians are atheists. A decent girl should at least believe in God."

Yeah, I've had some wild times.

Watching the Repubs last night took me back to my youth, when my mother and stepfather had friends over for drinks and dinner. They were the typical country club conservatives who played golf, told racist jokes, loved Nixon, even during Watergate, hated commies, though I don't think any of them ever met a real Marxist or socialist, wore "square" clothes, the whole bit. Their lives seemed so limited to me, and I couldn't wait to escape, grow my hair long, smoke dope, and meet some of those people they openly despised. All of which I did -- and more. But that's another rant.

In short, there's only so much concentrated right wing blather I can take in one sitting; and last night, I was able to stomach some of Rudy Giuliani, and a little of Sarah Palin. That was it. I turned to HBO's "Hard Knocks," a look inside the Dallas Cowboys' training camp. I love pro football, which provides finer, fascistic entertainment. The purity of padded violence is a lot more honest than those speeches in St. Paul. And what I wouldn't give to see Giuliani creamed by full-scale blitz. He has to be one of the phoniest "tough guys" in modern politics.

A few readers, upset with my Dem slams from last week, asked why I don't go for Republican throats more often. Why my "obsession" with the mules? I think the answer is self-evident, if you've read me with any regularity. But if you're new to this patch, the basic reason is that Dems and liberals claim to be "progressive," and thus my allies, so I examine their motives and political history much closer than I do with reactionaries, who make no pretense of having my back. There are numerous sites that regularly bash the right, so if you need that kind of action, there's plenty to choose from. I bash my share as well, but it's not a preoccupation. I have no tribe, no flag, no gang colors. Again, if these things matter to you, the liblogs are but a click away.

I also received a tremendous outpouring of support from readers and friends, asking me to not shut down the blog. I knew airing that thought might be seen as a cheap sympathy ploy, but it wasn't. I was completely serious, and to a degree still am. This fucking election is killing my mind and stomping my soul. American political reality is as bad as I've ever seen it, and I suspect we haven't reached bottom yet. Maybe we never will. Maybe we're destined to float down the shit stream indefinitely, splashing, sinking, swallowing mouthfuls of sewage. Hard to tell. All I know is that I'm sick of the rancid taste, and would much prefer a healthier diet, or at least something with a fresh lemon scent. What you saw the other day was me snapping and flipping out. Apologies. I'm not saying that it won't happen again, but I wanted to be clear about where I was coming from, to the degree that I know myself.

So, for the time being anyway, I'll keep tapping out whatever. Your thoughts and suggestions, even financial donations, are of course always welcome. I'm going away for a few days to clear my head and recharge. I should be back next Tuesday, hopefully with a smile, a song, and perhaps some dirty limericks or haiku of a "suggestive" nature. I understand that blind monks get really weird behind rice paper doors.

LISTEN: To me on a right wing radio show in Cincinnati, one of my least favorite towns. I'm going to appear on many reactionary programs during this election season, and I find it fun fucking with their preconceptions of my Dem critique. Fear not -- I'll be doing liberal shows as well. They're not as juicy as the right, but a boy must go where the microphones are open.