Blue Monday

A foul, dark mood is brewing in my head, for various reasons, some of which I may explain, some of which should be left to rot. Suffice it to say that I'm not really in a writing state of mind, though that's rarely stopped me before. Still, if you could feel what I currently feel, you might want to smash every keyboard in sight in order to avoid appearing insane.

As my Cub Scout leader used to tell me, if you can't say something nice about someone, blow up their house and set fire to their lawn.

I will say this: If it wasn't for Britney Spears' sleepwalking routine at last night's Video Music Awards, what in the world would Americans have to talk about today? Oh yeah -- Kid Rock and Tommy Lee trading off-stage slaps. Now that's rock and roll . . . or whatever it is Rock and Lee spew out. In a Justin Timberlake world, somebody's gotta be a badass. Michael Vick's too busy to comply, while Gen. David Petraeus is doing his pantomime war dance on Capitol Hill. Which reminds me, tomorrow's another 9/11 anniversary. Gee, I can't wait to write about that.